


Life, Love, and Lizards

by rezi



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Developing Relationship, F/F, Fluff, Lizards
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-15
Updated: 2018-02-15
Packaged: 2019-03-18 23:55:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,418
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13692489
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rezi/pseuds/rezi
Summary: Homestuck Valentine gift for tealrezi on tumblr.Vriska moved in next door a couple of weeks ago. She's the sort of person who thinks they know it all... but you know better. She knows nothing about lizards, for a start! And she has no idea how to find her way around this place. She doesn't know about the cave with a river in it, or the cool tyre swing across the river, or the fort on your side of the river that you'd defend against the Mbele twins. You won that long and brutal war, but only because they surrendered by moving away. The cave hasn't seen a battle since.Things have been too quiet since they left. You're hoping Vriska can be a match for you.





	Life, Love, and Lizards

"Which one's that?" she asks you.

"Celerysniff," you say. She's green, she's got stripes running along her body, she's got a really cute little snout... the name was obvious. "She's young. A little shy. But she's already good friends with Pepperskin and Marshmallow."

"That's a fucking weird name for a lizard," Vriska says, smiling anyway. "Don't they, like, eat things alive? I can't imagine a lizard eating _celery_. Or sniffing it."

"Some of them do eat celery! And some of them eat things alive. Some of them do both." You give Celerysniff a boop on her li'l snout. "Celerysniff doesn't eat celery, though. That's cannibalism. You wanna touch her?"

"Sure." She brings a finger close, hesitant...

"You gotta be more confident than that!" You sigh at her. "If you're scared, she's scared too. If she's scared, she bites!" You mime it for her benefit, chomping your teeth together, and she flinches.

"Confident?" She gives a barbed laugh. "Oh, _I_ know how to be confident. Just watch!" 

Vriska holds up her index finger as straight as a pin, glaring at Celerysniff way too hard. She goes in for the boop--

"OW!"

You laugh. "Looks like she eats Vriskas, too."

"Hey!" She cradles her finger in her hand. "It _hurt!_ "

"Celerysniff's pretty harmless compared to the bigger ones. Come on," you say, heading to the bathroom and gesturing for her to follow. "You're gonna need to wash that."

* * *

Vriska moved in next door a couple of weeks ago. She's the sort of person who thinks they know it all... but you know better. She knows nothing about lizards, for a start! And she has no idea how to find her way around this place. She doesn't know about the cave with a river in it, or the cool tyre swing across the river, or the fort on your side of the river that you'd defend against the Mbele twins. You won that long and brutal war, but only because they surrendered by moving away. The cave hasn't seen a battle since.

Things have been too quiet since they left. You're hoping Vriska can be a match for you.

Right now, she's kicking at a rock on the ground. "Is this all? Just some cave?"

"What do you mean, 'is this all'? I fought over this territory for _years!_ I'll have you know that Patience Mbele used to defend this patch of ground with all her might!" You remember the volleys of mud she would send flying your way. No invader could stand in her path. "Not that it mattered, in the end."

"Why would anyone wanna defend this?" She kicks the rock into the river. "It's _ground._ Not gold, not treasure, nothing but ground!"

"Because it was _theirs!_ " You sigh. Not only are there things she doesn't know... there are a lot of things she doesn't _understand._ "We each had our turf, and we would defend it to the death. Or until they left." 

She finds the remains of their fort, built up with walls of stones packed together with mud. "They thought this shit was worth defending?"

_"Yes!"_ you cry. "That wasn't their first fort, you know. I destroyed their first with a sly act of sabotage, but they rebuilt it into that." You run a finger along one of the smooth stones jutting out from the wall. "I never got past those defences. Not until they were no longer in them."

Vriska walks around the fort. Looks down within the walls. Goes through the narrow entrance and inside.

"I could do better," she says.

* * *

It's been four days since the new war commenced. At first you had control over the region, but Vriska's been fighting back with such ferocity that she's taken all the land up to her side of the river... and almost some more.

You look at her, languishing in her fort, surrounded by the blue objects (feathers, string, stickers) that mark out her territory. Now would be the perfect time to strike... if it weren't for her slingshot aimed at you, a clod of mud ready to fire. Instead you simply observe her, lying back in the little chair she's brought in, resting her head on a pillow, her head protected from the dripping cave ceiling by a blue blanket stretched above her head.

Chairs. Pillows. Blankets. Half of you scoffs at it: there's no time for luxury with battles to be fought! But the other half... kinda wishes you'd thought of that. As nice as your big red dragon cloak is, it's not as comfy as a pillow would be. And you'd like to not have to sit on the floor.

Oh shit. She's emerging. Approaching the tyre swing, which is currently hotly contested between the pair of you. She's going to claim it as her own, isn't she? Blue tape in her hand, ready to stick her garish colour across the main crossing.

You're not just going to sit here while she takes this strategic keystone. You heft your big red water gun and make your own approach...

A noise echoing from upstream! The sound of collapsing rocks, of a large body dragging itself over ground.

Vriska nearly slips on the mud. "What the fuck?"

You leap up and run to the riverbank. "It's the cavebeast!"

" _Cavebeast?_ You never told me about a cavebeast!"

"There's so much to tell you, Vriska, it's not my fault I haven't had time to tell you!"

You're beginning to see the glint of its eyes. You've never seen it too closely, but you've seen its silhouette: a giant lizard, far bigger than Celerysniff or Pepperskin or Marshmallow. You'd love to have a lizard like that join your family, but you don't think the cavebeast's friendly.

Vriska's backing away. "Can we fight it off?"

"My water gun just makes it angrier. Trust me."

"Then..." Vriska darts a look back to the cave entrance. "We can't run away! Big monster in a cave, we gotta fight! That's how it works!"

(She's still backing off, though. Faster than before.)

And now you can see its silhouette again, though with colours becoming clear as it darts through spots of light. It's... green. Light stripes run along it from head to tail.

That's actually a pretty cute snout. For a lizardmonster that's taller than you.

Vriska's backing away still, but raising her slingshot--

"Put that down," you tell her.

She does, but: "Terezi, what the fuck? It's fight or flight here, and I don't see you running away!"

It's almost reached you now, but it's slowing down. You can see it in its full splendour now, and... wow. That's a lot of lizard!

The cavebeast stops in front of you. You reach up to lightly tap her cute big snout. You're not afraid. You recognise her now.

"Celerysniff Senior," you whisper.

* * *

"So yeah, that's why the Mbeles moved out," you say, back in the safety of your home, with Celerysniff (Junior) lazing around in your hand. "Turns out their parents didn't like there being a lizard monster around."

"I can't fucking believe you just _befriended_ it like that!" Vriska says, staring at you in... amazement? Confusion? Little bit of both, little bit of something else too.

"Befriended _her,_ " you correct her.

"Right." 

"I don't think we should have our war there any more," you say. "We were trying to claim it as our territory, but it was hers all along."

"We could move to our back yards?" Vriska suggests. "The fence is the starting boundary. And we're both able to climb over it. Let's see what territory we can claim."

"Yeah! And that means I can bring my family." You give Celerysniff a li'l boop. "The cave is too cold for them, but I can have them out to bring to my back yard, that's fine."

"Hey, if you get to bring reinforcements, I'll have to have some too!" She looks at Celerysniff with fondness. She's really warmed up to her. "I kinda wanna ask for a lizard for my birthday..."

"Fuck yeah!" You grin at her. "In the meantime, wanna boop Celerysniff?"

"Sure." She approaches her, with true confidence this time, and boops Celerysniff right on her cute li'l snout. Then boops you on your nose, too. You laugh.

(It feels weirdly great whenever she touches you. You're not quite sure what that is yet. You'll probably find out some day... but for now, you can just enjoy it for whatever it is.)

You make sure to boop Vriska right back.


End file.
